Easter 2011

Some cute pictures before we get into Easter pictures

Got to love this cute face Ryan is such a little cheese ball

Ryan looks more than thrilled that Cameron is giving him a hug Now onto Easter

The Easter bunny did come to out house. When I was little the Easter bunny would leave a trail from our beds around the house until we found our Easter basket. Well the bunny ran out of jelly beans this year so he left Easter eggs from the kids beds downstairs to the baskets. I was mid blink but Cameron is super cute

Cameron looking super cute with his new Easter outfit. It was a HUGE fight to get Ryan to put on his vest. Crying and a major fit of I don't want to happened before church. I told him he could take it off after we got home. By the time we got home from church he decided he liked it. Kid you drive me crazy sometimes. Trying to get a family picture is next to impossible. It didn't help that it was super sunny. I told them all I wanted to do is get a family picture then they could change. We will try and get a better one next year.

We set up our new tent Saturday afternoon to waterproof it. The boys are super excited for the next time we go camping. We where suppose to go the weekend after Easter but it was way to windy so we had to put it off for a few more weeks.

Before dinner we went out to see Gpa Bird at the nursing home. The boys took him a little candy and everyone was happy.

The yard is covered with eggs because we ran out of hiding places

Yep we will hide everywhere

Cameron figured out how it worked this year. He was happy to be getting eggs a little slow since every time he found one he would come and show me instead of putting it in his bucket and then going and getting more.

Ryan knows that the best place to start looking for eggs is in the cars.

Ryan knows the normal hiding spots so he is showing Andrew some of he secrets and sharing the loot.

Becky came out for a little of Easter egg fun it looks like she is plotting her attack for next years hunt.

So Many Feelings

I have been putting off and putting off writing anything but sometimes when I put what I am feeling down on paper sometimes it is just the release that I need. It has been a crazy couple of weeks. Blaine started school a week ago. I have really been trying not to complaine. I had a lot of anxieties about him going back to school. I knew that he was suppose to go to school and I am so proud and happy that he is sacrificeing so much for our family but he is such a hands on dad. I didn't know how I was going to handle becoming a single parent. I try and look at what some of my friends are going though and have gone though and I think to myself at least he gets to come home at night and on the weekends. Some of my friends husbands have been or are currently in the military on the front lines, husbands going to medical school or are doing residency and they never get to see them. I have my kids to focus on even though they like to drive me crazy sometimes. I thought it was going to be really hard with Cameron. Cameron has always been a daddy's boy. Something happens he wants dad the only way he would go to sleep at night would be on daddy. He never wanted me so I didn't know how it was going to work. Cam also is a night owl like his dad he would go to bed around 11:00ish get up two or three times a night and then be up for the day at 7:00. I don't handle no sleep well it makes me sick after about a day of it.A week before Blaine started school Cameron had a change of heart. He started sleeping better and he wanted me. It was crazy he wouldn't go to sleep on Blaine he wanted me. It has been a pretty smooth transition with Blaine being gone. The night before he started school I told him that I wanted a blessing. We went over to his parents house so that his dad could help him. His dad thought it was kind of weird that I wanted a blessing but I had so much going on in life right then. Knowing that I was going to have to depend on others for help. That I won't get any breaks unless I am at work and that I won't be able to see my best friend all the time. He gets up at 4am goes to work till 1:30 drives to Avondale is in school till 8:45 and gets home between 9:30-9:45 eats I yell at him to take a shower and go to bed. He usually falls asleep between 10:45-11:30 and then gets up and starts it all over the next day all without complaining. On top of Blaine going back to school and all the stress that comes from that. We have applied for ACHCCS and still haven't heard anything and I have hospital bills coming in and wanting money. Cameron hasn't gotten his 2 year well visit cuz I can't afford it at the moment. I have had girl issues ever since my miscarriage last summer. Some moths my friend comes to visit I have gone two months with out it I have had it for 18 days so SICK of not knowing what is going on. Over the last year I have personally made pregnancy test stock go up all of my tests have come out negative of course otherwise I would be a lot happier. Ryan prays every night that we will have a baby girl. I don't know why but about two months ago he told me that we needed a baby girl and to go to the store and get one. I told him it didn't work like that so I told him to start asking Heavenly Father for it. I get so I don't know if the word is worried but is driving me crazy because every time we have wanted to get pregnant we do within a month or two. It has almost been a year since I miscarried and still nothing. I feel bad for feeling that way sometimes because I have friends who haven't been able to have any children and really have a hard time getting pregnant and every once in a while I wonder if something is wrong with me. I have had some abnormal PAP tests and they said the last colposcopy that I had they said it could be pre-cancer so that is part of the reason why I have been scared to go back in to see the doctor and then being poor and not having insurance has something to do with it as well. Yes before I get 50 billion comments about how I need to go see a dr I have an appointment next Friday I am praying that our insurance gets approved before that but not looking good on that front so I will have to pay out of pocket. I feel like sometimes I shouldn't want more kids I should be happy with the ones that I have when so many of my friends and some family can't . But it doesn't work like that. I feel without a shadow of a doubt that we still have little ones to come to our family. I want a girl more than anything I am so glad that we had our Emily and I know I will get to raise her later but how I long for a baby girl during this earthly life to raise. Blaine thinks our next baby will be a girl since that is what we had talked about when we got married we would have a boy girl boy girl. So far that is they way it has worked we had Ryan, Emily, and Cameron. Ryan really wants baby Gracie to come join our family. Yep our next girl will be Grace. I have had some people say we are crazy for not waiting until Blaine is done with school. Well to that I say I'm not pregnant yet so I guess its not something to worry about until we cross that road. I am not a pleasant pregnant person. I get really sick and have no energy. I hate being pregnant because I usually can't walk for about a month our two before because my back is so bad. I would rather just skip to delivery. I get my drugs and have a baby. We have talked about if our next one is a girl that would be it and we would be done. We will see what happens with that. I guess we will see what the doc has to say next week. It doesn't help the baby hungry part of me when I would say about 10 of my friends are prego or just had a baby. I know that my time will come I just have to be patient. What Blaine and I keep saying is if it is suppose to happen it will happen. That is what I have to keep telling myself.

Island Fest 2011

This year was my first Island Fest. I have been helping with the PTO in setting stuff up and part of the finishing touches. I got to make sure that all of the booths had places for the tickets some of the cans I had to re-do but for the most part it was cleaning out bugs from the cans then taking them back to the school. The night of Island fest I had my Gma come help me because I don't have Blaine at night and I had to work at one of the booths for an hour. Each of the grades had a booth. The Kindergartners had a duck pond and you had to catch a little duck and then you got a prize. Ryan's class got to make part of the decorations so he was showing that off. They had 6 different bounce type things. Two smaller ones for little kids an huge double slide a Jurassic Climbing running thing an obstacle course race bouncer and this Spider man 40ft climb up and slide down thing from Hell. You can tell I don't like that one. I was working the novelty shop and Ryan really wanted to do the huge slide. I said that was fine Gma took him over there and stood in line with him for an hour not sure how Cameron let them but anyway. I get a call towards the end of my shift saying Ryan is stuck you need to come get him. So I run over to the spider man ride and Ryan is on like the 3rd level stuck and crying. The guy didn't even see him stuck so I went around and told him that I need to get up to my kid. Well I thought that would be no problem boy was I wrong. Now the side of it was this web thing that you had to get 40ft in the air then you could make it to the slide. You know the webbing that they have at McDonald's is tight and you can step on it and it's not problem. Not this one it was elastic and would spread apart make you do the splits. I get to Ryan and he has one of the straps wrapped around his arm and somehow he had his neck caught in it. I was ready to freak out but had to stay calm so that what little footing he had he didn't loose fall and really hang himself. I finally got him loose and said that we needed to go down but he kept crying saying that he wanted to keep going. Seriously I got some strength that I didn't know I had because it was one of the hardest things I have ever had to do. Pushing him up and then trying to get my big self up there. We finally made it to the top and the slide was cool and fast BUT that was crazy hard. They really should of had an age limit or better supervising or something. I was so mad and still pretty upset about it. Ryan ended up having nightmares that night and was up a couple of times cuz he was stuck. Poor kid over all it was a good night and we had an awesome turn out. We have another PTO meeting coming up in a couple of weeks so I will defiantly be bringing this up because I know my kid is not the only one who got stuck in this particular ride. I helped clean up and we didn't get done till 10:30 good thing is we got passes to the Fire Hall of Fame that we won in the raffle that we will go do sometime this summer when it is super hot outside.

I HATE THIS THING it took me a week to be able to walk agian and I am still having problems with my back.

Happy Birthday Babe

I know I am late yesterday was my hubbys 33 rd birthday. I told him to take the day off so we could do something fun. Thursday's a great becsue it is Grandma day for Ryan. She pickes him up from school and then they go to gymnastics. I knew I didn't have to worry about him now I just had Cameron. I asked my Gma if she could watch him for a while plus it gave her a reason not to spend all day at the nursing home well it gave an excuse to give Gpa whay Gma couldn't spend all day at the nursing home. Dropped Cameron off and went and saw the 1st movie of the day(cuz you get in for $5.50) we went and saw Limitless. It was better than I thought it was going to be. Then we went to Dave and Busters for lunch and games. Blaine's company have team building stuff sometimes and last year they had one at Dave and Busters. He has some points left so we went. We had the place pretty much to ourselves since it was a Thursday afternoon. The food was good and we had a lot of fun playing all the games. Would be a fun place to go for a date night with friends sometime. We went out and got Cameron and fallowed my Gma out to see Gpa. He is at a new place a nice one in fact so he was happy to See Cameron. Then we took Cam and went looking for a new TV stand. We re arranged our living room and the one that we have right now is to big. We went to every store we could think of. Our last stop was Ikea and we found something there that will work we will see. All in all it was a good day. The boys started by taking him his gift in bed. We got him a netbook thought it would be fun for him to have since he is going back to school. He seems to like it we will have some more celebration on Sunday when we do birthday dinner for both him and Audrey. So I just wanted to say Happy Birthday Babe thanks for spending the day with me. I am proud of you for going back to school even though it is going to be a hard 11 months. I know in the end it will be all worth it. Thank you for making such a huge sacrifice to help your family. I hope you know how proud we all are of you.

Big Boy Rides

The first ride Ryan went on was the Jaguar I didn't get any pictures of that one because Cameron was board so we went and walked around for a while. The 2nd one Ryan went on was Monizoma's Revenge. I don't like that one at all I think I have only been on this one twice. Ryan thought it was fun but didn't expect the G force that came with it. Blaine said he looked over at him and his head was at his knees so he had to push him back up. The head in the knees gave him two little black eyes but he said it was fun.

I can't believe he wanted to sit in the front but he did

Ryan loved the swing. I think he did this one 3 or 4 times.

Can't get enough of this. Then they decided that they where going to go on th boomarang. I hate this ride more than anything in the world. Ryan thought it was cool.I can't believe that he had fun on this. The 1st and last time I rode this I got so so sick. Then the boys wanted to go on the Silver Bullet. They waited about 45 minuets for this ride and he had a lot of fun. I wasn't so sure about it since there really wasn't anything keeping him in it but he thought it was great.
He had such a great time and really wanted to go on all the rides the four that he couldn't go on I am sure he will be able to next year.